Assurance: The Subjective Test

Like many children that grow up in a Christian home, I came to know Christ as my Savior at a young age. However, as childhood turned into adolescence, I often struggled with assurance of my salvation. The most profound doubts would trouble me at bedtime, and I’d often ask the Lord to save me many times in just one night. I’m sure I prayed the “sinner’s prayer” over a thousand times between the ages of 6 and 12.

Later, I would find out that these doubts were shared by many who had a similar upbringing. Assurance of salvation is a real issue for young Christians, and older Christians too. Younger Christians are just confused – “Did I say the right words?”, “Was a I really sincere?” “Did God accept my prayer?” Older Christians also deal with issues of guilt and shame – “Can God really love me after what I’ve done?” “If I’m saved, why would I commit that sin again?”

My journey came to a breaking point when I was 12 years old. The doubts had risen to a fever pitch, and while I was at a Christian camp one summer, I began to search God’s Word anew for answers to my doubts. One of my counselors recommended the Book of 1 John. I read it in one sitting. On my own, I began to read through Romans as well. Eventually, I came to chapter 8, verse 14, which reads, “For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God.”

This was a turning point for me, and I routinely share this moment in my salvation testimony. Was I truly saved? Had I put my faith in Christ as a six-year-old? Or was my profession hollow, insincere? Paul tells the Romans that those who are led by the Spirit of God are God’s children. So I asked myself, “Is God at work in my heart? Is His Spirit leading me, convicting me of sin, giving me an appetite for righteousness?” The honest answers of my heart were all “yes!”

Admittedly, this is a subjective test. It is based on our own experience, and experience is not always the best determinant of truth. Still, it is a biblical test. Romans 8:16 goes on to say, “The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God.” There is, then, a communion between God’s Spirit and ours, and this confirms the reality of our adoption into His family.

This truth is corroborated by John’s first epistle. Chapter 4:24b reads, “And by this we know that He [that is, God] abides in us, by the Spirit whom He has given us.” Furthermore, Paul told the Ephesians that they were sealed by the Holy Spirit, who is the guarantee of their inheritance (Ephesians 1:13-14). This is not only an objective fact, but a subjective experience, because when the Spirit indwells us, he washes our hearts (Titus 3:5), cleanses our consciences (Hebrews 9:14), and renews our desires (Galatians 5:16-18). Indeed, when the Holy Spirit takes up residence, there is a difference!

One test of assurance is the objective test: God promised that all who called upon him would be saved. The second test is the subjective test. Does introspection lead to the confirming communion of the Spirit of God? Does personal examination uncover the presence and guidance of the Holy Spirit? If so, this can be a great source of assurance. I know it was for me many years ago, and still is today.

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